I hold space for people in the quiet seasons of their lives. The need to seek out a medium often comes from pain. The pain of grief and loss, or the pain and discomfort of awakening — knowing there is an answer to the questions your soul is presenting to you.
I’m familiar with quiet seasons of grief and loss myself. I believe the spirit world chooses us for mediumship partly for this reason. We are mediums not because we are floating above life and impervious to pain. It’s because we know life, we recognize pain in others, and we have agreed to work in cooperation with the spirit world to provide comfort, healing, and peace.
Quiet seasons are the times when we withdraw from creating, or at least we think we have. Instead of having the type of achievements or excitement to post on Instagram, we are excited to have showered and got dressed for the day. To walk barefoot on the grass, to put our hands in wet dough and learn the process of braiding it, to track the moon's cycles.
I’ve wandered into this place often over the last five years. Writing my book, ending my first marriage, building my business, online dating. Landscapes of integration where I’ve needed to pause. Take stock of my resources. Look into my own eyes in the mirror and try to recognize myself.
What I’m blessed and thankful to know is that most of us wander in and out of these seasons quietly and often. We come undone, put ourselves back together, and come out the other side with a lot to show for it.
I’ve published my book, and married the woman I love. We’ve traveled and bought a home together. All perfectly sharable.
I’m not suggesting that you share all of your heartaches and complicated feelings. In fact, these quiet seasons bring the gift of solitude and space to integrate.
The integration allows your mind, body, and spirit to become aligned with your new reality. Without it, I don’t believe we can grow and return to creating for ourselves.
I mourn the losses acquired during my quiet seasons. There were relationships I couldn’t hold together, creative ideas that didn't work out, and opportunities I had to pass up. I didn’t have the capacity.
I remind myself that my life is a product of all that works behind the scenes. I am more open about my struggles than most, I’m doing my part to normalize burning down a life and starting over.
When I ask myself if I am doing enough, she answers back, “You are paving the way.”
When I’ve hugged myself long enough to feel soothed and kneaded enough dough to feel useful, my ideas feel light and possible.
Taking your time with the planting is worth it. If you feel like you’re wandering aimlessly, and if all your accomplishments feel too tender to share, that’s usually a good sign that you're integrating.
And you are worth the time it takes to become yourself.
Love,
Sheryl
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